Difficult

First of all, since my last post, let me just say that the gray-ness has lifted a little. I was able to find excitement and joy these last couple weeks - some rays of sunshine amidst the ominous clouds. Those rays came in the form of my wonderful, blessed friends. Last weekend, I got to spend time with some of my dearest friends, who are just coming closer and closer to my heart with each passing day. We had an adult sleepover! I got to do some of my favorite things - cook and talk! As I was driving out to my friend Kari's house I felt something that I hadn't felt in a while - those little excited butterflies in my stomach! THANK YOU LORD! We had an amazing time of food and fellowship that was healing to my heart. Thank you Lord for giving me such incredible, godly, loving women in my life. Thank you dear friends for sharing a weekend with me and showing me light and love.

On the other hand, this week has been especially rough. I know I'm not the only one who is grieving Anthony who feels this way. For many of us, this week has been like feeling all the craziness all over again. WHY??? Is it just because of the passage of time? Or because there seem to be more and more reminders every day?? Or just because it's how this grief thing works? On Wednesday, Chris and I both were just BLAH. I just wanted to cry and he just wanted to hit something. I think we were feeling the same thing - just the girl version and the guy version. :) At the end of the day, we both just sat on the couch with nothing to say. So, we opened up the Bible and just started to read. I don't even remember where we read or what we read, but just basking in the words of our Lord was refreshing. It was like a balm to my weary soul. Neither of us said much, we just listened to the words. Thank you Lord for Your word. Thank you that we aren't hindered from reading it! Thank you that you poured out your love for us into something we can read!

So, if you are still reading, please keep praying. Three months is coming up. But thank God for friends, family and His constant provision. ALSO - we have a new nephew! Corbin Dahlin-Vietti. Little dude, Anth would've loved to meet you.