Christmas???

It does NOT feel like Christmas. The last few weeks have just been such a blur. Especially the last few days. It's been a marathon of memorials - first Luke's, then Anth's, then Katie's. All three were so different, but all SO incredibly good. Anth's was so healing...and just so special. I loved being able to worship and praise my Jesus with everyone I love. It was also so amazing to see how many people were there to celebrate Anthony's life. Thank you to everyone who came and celebrated with us. There aren't words to describe how grateful and blessed we all are.

I really don't want to celebrate Christmas. It just doesn't seem right. I feel weird eating good food, smiling and laughing. It's not time yet. I'm not ready.

BUT. I am SO grateful that in this season, my God is Emmanuel, God with us. No matter what the circumstance, no matter what I am feeling...He is there. He cares. He never leaves me or forsakes me. There is nothing that can ever separate me from His love. Even if I'm not ready to celebrate the birth of my Lord - He understands...and He is patiently waiting. He will hold me up and enable me to stand up under this sorrow. He is GOOD and His love endures forever.